"Finish already, come out, ok?"
"Finish, come out!"
"Calder, finish - come out!"
"Calder come out!"
"Calder!"
"Calder Kam Chuen!"
The exasperation of a Mom who couldn't get her autistic adolescent to come out of the male toilet. Oh, if only he could be tied to a string that I can pull to get him out of the Gents. It's at times like this that I wish all public pools have unisex toilets.
Calder has taken to doing things wrong and waiting for us to correct him. He puts on his pants back to front, wears his shirt inside out, even attempts to spoon food into his cup. Then he watches our reaction. Are we facing the most primitive form of teenage rebellion?
There's nothing that gets to a Mom than when her 12-year-old empties his bladder entirely into his pants and laughs over it, and does it successively. Makes you want to lie down and not do anything for a long long time.
When I borrow books for Calder, I choose those with uncluttered design, with short text because Calder's habit is to read aloud from beginning to end in one sitting. Calder also likes books with photographs. Found this wonderful educational series on how things are made: Step-by-step Transformations. This morning, without prompting, Calder picks up the one on orange juice and starts reading it with glee. Rare initiative. I rewarded him with an orange.
Is it possible to speak without moving the lips? Calder has been doing that lately, so much so that I have to ask him to repeat 5 times before I could figure out what he said.
If being frozen is PAUSE mode, I should write also about Calder's REWIND mode. Recently he has taken to reversing his actions. He sits and stands up then sits down again. He puts food into his mouth, spits it out then puts it back. Today I asked him to keep the laundry and actually saw him trying to fling his Daddy's dried pants back over the bamboo. He walks 3 steps forward then 2 steps back, so that I constantly have to wait for him to catch up. Eventually I figured it may be easier to walk with my arm locked over his neck. This morning, I asked him, "Calder, are you a trolley that I must pull along?
Something strange is happening to Calder who turns 12 this Nov. As he enters adolescence, he loses his need for routine. Unfortunately he swings to the other extreme - he does not take the next step without instruction. I have to tell him to gargle after brushing his teeth, then nod at him to indicate now he can wipe his face etc. Otherwise he gets stuck in the toilet. Once, 9-year-old Ethel timed him to see how long he'd remain in the toilet (yes he even waits for us to tell him to wash hands and to exit from the toilet). After 19 minutes, we couldn't take it anymore and started talking about delicious chicken wings to lure him out! Calder used to be our most reliable janitor making sure unused appliances were turned off, picking up used clothes to put in the laundry basket etc. These disappeared with a puff some two weeks ago and we are left with a robot often frozen mid-task. This calls for patient endurance. May God have mercy on us.
